life balance is a verb

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bicycle-balance-verb(450x375)

In my coaching I find that many people speak of life balance. They speak of wanting it, going after it, yet not achieving it. There there are those who say they don’t believe in it. And some, dispel life balance as a total myth. Often, I find that these references speak to life balance as a scale on which each side must be equal.

No surprise these are the beliefs than many hold. Traditionally, life balance is pictured as a scale. Prompting people to believe it has something to do with having it all and balancing it all equally. Other times, it references the clock and speaks of the amount of time we give each element in our lives. Making us feel that if they are not equal, our life is out of balance.

I have found that these perspectives leave me feeling less out of balance and more stressed. Striving to achieve artificial forms of balance push us further away from any chance of having or knowing life balance.  No wonder so many dispel it as an untainable reality or a myth.

For me, life balance isn’t’ about equals, or a static place to which we arrive. It is more about the energy and movement, living and working with clear and joyful intentions, and taking steps to realize them.

  • For me, it is more like a bike ride:
  • You have to want to do it.
  • Mastery is in the practice.

You may fall. But, with the time, help, and the right gear you may master the ride and enjoy the journey.
Some tips for life balance and energy that are like riding a bike:

  • You are in balance when you keep moving forward (with or without a goal. one pedal/step at a time) 
  • Pace yourself. Peddle too slowly and it feels unsteady (stuck or procrastination) too fast and you may crash (burnout). 
  • It helps not to look back for too often or too long (dwell on/worry about what’s behind you and you may fall over)
  • When you fall don’t be hard on yourself. Give some TLC to any wounds. Then, take a breath, reconnect with your why (for riding), and get back on the bike.
  • Breathe ease up on your grip, and enjoy the ride. 
  • One day, it comes to you unconsciously, with ease and you’re riding without hands, or at least without fear).
  • Celebrate when you finally ride, even a few feet, without falling.

Remember to breathe.

Wishing you the peace and and happiness of life in balance.

From my heart to yours,

karensigheart
Remember to breathe.
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are you feeding the comparison gremlins?

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Do you find yourself being stopped in your tracks by the comparison gremlins?  Does the competition rob you of your energy and ideas?

If so, I so feel you.

In the past, I would start out with great ideas that filled me with joy and passion.  I had lots of energy and was ready to change the world …or at least my small part of it.  I would begin to research and work on my idea, gathering resources and all I needed to bring it to life.

I had the confidence to share the idea with friends and colleagues and was elated when I received glowing feedback.  This inspired me to keep working on the idea and share it with others.  It felt right, and all of my senses told me it was the “right” thing to do.

As time went on, I began to take notice of other messages.  The unsolicited images and messages that flew by on the screens of my computer, smartphone or tablet were making me question myself and my idea.   It seemed as though everyone was enjoying a “six-figure launch,” “a million-dollar lifestyle,” or “30-day weight loss”.  It made me wonder if my idea was good enough.  Could I really call it “good enough” if it did not create a million-dollar launch?

I began to question myself and my idea.  My energy waned and I began to feel stuck.  My creativity was off and I couldn’t access my intuition.  I lost focus and began to procrastinate.  I withdrew and felt small.

This is when I realized I was spending more time comparing and competing than I was creating.  The comparison gremlins, a.k.a. the green monsters, were haunting me and eating away at my confidence. Simply admitting this to myself helped ease the stress.  It helped me realize they were thoughts and perceptions not reality.  I realized I had a choice of what to read and watch, and what to believe about the messages outside, and inside, my head.  It was time to take control and be more intentional about what I was taking in and how I received those messages.

It took time, but I began by limiting my visits to the internet, and when there, was intentional about seeking positive, spirit-lifting people and messages to balance any draining thoughts and feelings.  I remembered that community is an important element of joy and success, and began reaching out to people to make more in-person connections.

As I regained the courage to talk about my idea, I was pleasantly surprised to find that it was well-received and the original passion started to return.  I treated the gremlins of doubt as I would the noise in my head during meditation, i.e., I let them slip by without engaging them.

I complemented this redirect with a gratitude journal and reminded myself of my original intention.  I remembered who I wanted to serve and how my idea would satisfy that need.  I remembered how my idea was not only about business, but how I could practice my other passion: art and creativity.

With time and practice, I got clear that it is not about what others say, but how I feel about my self-worth.  When I believed in myself, the negative thoughts and ideas had a lesser impact.  They showed up but did not go deep.  With each day my confidence grew, and so did the abundance coming to me and my idea.

I invite you to let go of the comparison game, with others and in your head.  Let go of comparing yourself to what others are creating.  Allow yourself to be unique and hear your own voice.  Let go of the mis-belief that you cannot “beat” your prior success, and know that you have more than one “win” inside you.

Consider how you’re defining success.  Are you still moving forward and saying “no” to the thoughts and people who are no longer serving you?  Are you celebrating the “little” steps forward, and staying in touch with your passion?

Allow the fears and gremlins to rise.  Do not resist them, but do not indulge them.  Balance them with deep breaths and replace the thoughts with your dream thoughts.  Journal, draw, walk, blow bubbles, get out in nature, play with art and musci, have some fun or dance your way out of the stress you feel in your body.  Watch how it wains as you stop resisting it and simply do not feed the green gremlin of comparison, negative thoughts and feelings.

Know that I believe in you.  Give yourself big hugs, and remember to breathe.

Do these ideas resonate for you?  Do you have other ideas for dealing with the comparison gremlins?  Please share in the comments below or on my Facebook page.

From my heart to yours,

karensigheart

 

 

P.S. Irony is that I’m not good at vulnerable in my blog.  this blog sat in draft form for quite some time before i decided to publish it.  but, so many women I speak with seem to feel this way i decided to share.  hope it helps you in some small way.

 

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are you list-building or ❤ community building?

You probably know the term “list-building.”  If not, it is a term that refers to building an email list. I understand the value of “growing your list,” but the idea just seems so cold and distant.

For me, it feels better to speak in a gentler, more compassionate way of what the list represents.  Each name represents someone who wants to connect with me or what I share, e.g., a tele-class, guided meditation or coaching service.  I am honored by the connection and want to nurture this connection.  Together, each person contributes to what has become a community.  This reminds me that, I am not growing a list, I am creating community.  I do not do it alone.  I am the means by which each of us comes together to create our community.
Coming from this place of connection and community changes everything.  It changes my perspective on my communication, sales, the content of my email and marketing, and the language I use.  It feels more personal and connected.
I no longer what to shout, or put stuff out there.  I want a gentler more loving approach to connect and share.  I realize it is less about selling and more about serving.  My intention is for a two-way conversation. This is one of the reasons I have let go of my resistance to Facebook and started connecting in both private groups and public pages.  These groups allow the wonderful heart-centered people that have come into my circle to connect with me and with each other.  In this way, we can support and celebrate each other.
The video I recreated for my new program is an example of how this perspective is affecting me and this heart-centered, gentler way of being with my marketing and communications.  For example, with this in mind, I recreated the video below and added music to invite and soothe. (thanks to my daughter for this addition) For those of you who know me, I want to connect and guide people to slow down to speed your success. Would love to hear what you think and feel after watching.  (email me or visit my Facebook page)
In the future, you will see new ways I am creating to share this gentler, more loving approach to marketing and ways for us to connect. I am seeking topics, ideas, practices and different media to make this happen. Your suggestions are welcome.I invite you to visit my website and check out the calendar of events so you can plan ahead and keep in touch. (sometimes the calendar is glitchy and doesn’t hold the event, but most times it works, so also watch your email for invites) Some events are membership-specific to Retreat Muse Studio or Virtual RetreatU, but many are gratis and open to my community. I invite you to join me for a free call, virtual retreat, solstice or equinox celebration, Wisdom Tea meditation, and more.
Two programs that reflect the changes I am making to relate to this way of being in life and work. They are:

  • Love-based Copywriting - a FREE teleclass with Michele PW (was Thursday, Aug 28.  Click here to receive access to the audio recording of the live call)
  • My NEW Virtual RetreatU Leadership Training 8-Week Experience This is a unique learning experience that blends learning and retreat practice to guide you step-by-step to lead virtual retreats versus the traditional webinars and teleseminars, so we can connect from a heart-centered place (BTW, if it resonates, click here for the special community-gratitude/members-only price that is not available on the web page).
[[firstname]], Thank you for taking the time to read my blog, click the links and connect with me.  I am grateful for our connection in word, act and spirit.  I love finding resources, sharing the lessons I learn and the people I believe will help you create a more soulful and empowered life and biz.  Please share your suggestions for resources you would like to share in the comments below or on my Facebook page.  It takes a village and I want to share in this village with you.

Wishing you the joy of a heart-centered, joyFILLED life and business.
From my heart to yours,
karensigheart
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